This is a place where the most scholastically and intellectually superior individuals become the most distinguished and celebrated figures and the least academically and intellectually successful individuals become the most notorious and disrespected beggars of all time. This is a place where people only value actual achievements like “Award for Excellent Academic Performance” and “Most Distinguished Student of the Year” et cetera, but not the noble bond between unique hearts and minds. This is a place where friends become enemies and enemies don’t become your friends. In short, this is a place where the winners take all and losers take nothing.
Every time when I open the door of Room 413, I don’t feel like it is a room where I have spent most of my hours studying and chatting joyfully with my classmates. Instead, I feel like I am walking into some kind of dangerous wild forest living with tons of creepy monsters, well hidden behind the facade of dedication and diligence. The once innocent laughter have replaced by the pretentious flattery caused by the cruelness of reality and brutality of time. Everybody seems to be at least ten years older than their real age. When I walked down the corridor to find my own seat like I did it for months, all I hear was poisonous whispers like, “How come she can ace English but epicly fail in Maths?” et cetera, but not the cheerful giggles that I used to hear.
” How dare they can do this to me?”, says my neighbor Nicole.
“What’s wrong, dear?”, I replied.
”I followed the tips that they gave me in the study group and it all goes wrong. I got the lowest Calculus score ever.”, she said. When she handed me the exam paper, I saw nothing but a sea of red, a gigantic number 50 lying on the upper right corner of the paper. Below it was a ruthless remark, “Can be more careful. Too many careless mistakes this time!”
“Can you give me back the paper, PLEASE?”she asked, emphasizing on the “PLEASE” word. When I handed back the paper to her, all I can see it’s an expression of extreme sadness and desperation on her pretty face. However. this was quickly masked by a look of absolute disgust and horror. Her luscious lips with bright red lipstick have formed the straightest line I ever saw. Her eyes were wide open, but not the naive yet a little bit sharp sights that I was used to see, but crystal clear sorrowful tears raining down from her face like tiny diamonds.
“Nothing is genuine anymore, my dear. Even solid gold can have a faked one, let alone the tips Terrence and Kenneth gave you. They were my elementary school classmates, I know exactly what they were thinking. They will do everything they can to have the perfect grades.”, I said while I handed out a tissue for her to blow her nose.
“How come everyone become like this? We are supposed to be classmates, to become friends for a lifetime, but not fierce competitors or even arch-enemies.”, she said. I paused for a while, thinking over her words. She was right after all. Classmates were not supposed to be each other’s enemies. We should be each other’s friends and support each other whatever and wherever we are. However, the truth is, you can only be yourself’s best friend. In these desperate times, everybody kills each other for their crap out to get a piece of the “University Admission Offers” pie, nobody wanted to be left out. It’s either you win or I lose, such a simple fact as that.
“People are like this. They don’t expect you to become a peacemaker, they expect you to be an overachiever. If you want to be the creme de la creme, you have to strike down your opponents by all means. The only way you can save yourself is to trust no one and believe in your instincts only.”, I said.
Nicole didn’t respond to me, but she gave me a “someone is looking behind you” look and point her finger towards me. When I turned around, I saw my class teacher Mrs Blackwood, also known as the Mrs Cold-Blood. She was staring at me like a monster looking at its prey and said, “Jessica, I’m pretty sure you are clear with my rules, one of them is do not pronounce a single sound in my lessons, right?” I nodded with despair. “Now, please open your book and pay attention. I don’t want to see another B in your report card, especially in my subject.”, she said and turned back to the visualizer. I glanced around the classroom, hoping to catch a sympathetic look with messages like “ Just ignore Mrs Blackwood, she was having a bad day.” from my classmates. But as usual, nobody gave a damn about me and even started talking and laughing quietly behind my back. Suddenly, I felt like I was crushed, being hunted by a bunch of bloodthirsty cannibals, eating every part of me inside out. I guess I would be the center of negative attention for the next few days.
Later on that day, when I lay down on my bed, I couldn’t help but to retrace all the things Nicole and I have been through. Our classroom have become the battlefield, invisible bloodbaths happened every second. Knowledge wasn’t here to help you to solve problems anymore, they have become your weapon to kill and gear to survive. After all the thoughts, my final conclusion was it was all caused of one thing: Ambitions. Having ambitions to have a successful future or being an ambitious person isn’t a bad thing after all. We all want be ambitious as well, but the matter is you just have to be careful with your ambitions, or otherwise, being ambitious will become being aggressive. Do not underestimate the power of extreme ambitions, it will transform you from a nice and innocent schoolgirl into a psychotic murderer with no conscientiousness, willing to do everything to win. To be honest, no matter how ambitious you are, you are still another brick in the wall called reality. (1044)
a little whisper: okay so originally it’s a piece of article that I wrote for the admission of Manchester Metro U, but unfortunately I didn’t get in and a piece of work was left somewhere in my laptop. Until now, I just found out and I decided to post it here (no one will actually pay attention anyway)