A cont’d of my last post:
A semi blind date (?)
5. Emotional Breakdown (sort of?)
[a post of no pic, so please walk away now. if not, thanks for sticking with me and enjoy!]
3. Awkwardness of human interaction
So, out of nowhere and suddenly I have to talk about mutual human interaction/communication, which is very awkward to people like me that like stays at home and be invisible, rather than actually putting yourself out in the world and actually meeting new people.
It starts like this, a usual pre-birthday meet-up with a friend, plus her friend (who I obviously don’t know about). Originally, I proposed a meet up of 3 girls (which we obviously know each other for a couple of years), but she went to the state having an audition. So, my friend asked one of her friend to replace her and there it was. Beforehand, she keeps telling me that I can probably meet someone new and how nice of he etc etc. On that evening, I was going on an attempt of trying to stay low and modest as much as possible and it ends up I haven’t said a word almost the first half of the meet up.
The first half on the meet up is the dinner and my friend keeps asking me what do I want to eat. Okay girl, it is your birthday and I should leave this to you due to mutual human/birthday girl respect. We ended up in a small booth eating noodles (erm well…) and to be honest, my friend did most of the talking and I do most of the listening for the whole dinner. Tbh, I kinda feel weird and awkward and an epic fail at the same time.
Here’s an example:
Me: [playing stupid flappy bird]
my frd: [out of nowhere, speaking to me] do you know we all graduated in the same year?
Me: [still absent minded] oh yea really?
my frd: [suspiciously enthusiastic, to him] can you guess Jessica’s score in English?
Me: [oh god why]
Him: 4? (Highest: 5**)
Me: nope sry
my frd: [still suspiciously enthusiastic] I am not sure are you 5*?
Him: wow (i can’t remember much tho, but it is some word to express impressiveness)
Me: [starting to feel a lil troubled] nah I only got a 5 in total, only reading and speaking got 5*.
my frd: English sounds difficult to me, no matter how I study hard for it, I still can’t get a good grade.
Me and him: [sitting there awkwardly and look down on the phone].
To sum up the 1st half of the meet up, I feel left out and didn’t eat much (because I don’t want to feel like an absolute idiot in front of a guy I just know, okay you can judge me). After we finish the dinner, he settled the bill before we even know it and he said that it’s his treat for my frd. I managed to pay him back, (even though it’s cheap, but I don’t like having others to pay for me. It’s my principle.) but he politely refused it and said let’s count that as a celebration of meeting a new friend. I know he did it solely on politeness and generosity, but I still feel extremely awkward and weird.
The second part of the meet up is taking pictures (which I will witness sth even more weird later on). There’s a spacious plaza with stairs near the mall we had dinner in and she suggested we all go there and take some photos with another friend she just called. This is also the part which I feel slightly less weird, and it is all because I finally got something as my security blanket, aka a camera.
My frd was well-prepared to the max, she got her instant camera with loads of films and her digital camera ready. She keeps on insisting me and him should get a picture together qnd exchange numbers to remember such occasion that we met each other. And there it was, a picture of me awkwardly smiling and apparently keeping distance and him smiling as a “sunshine boy” (rly sry for lacking a better word to describe it) and a victory sign, but no numbers.
The true awkwardness starts here: when I tell my frd that you and him should probably get a pic together…. My frd obviously say yes and grabbed him together for a pose. She happily lean on his shoulder and I suddenly saw the expression of him. He stopped smiling and I can recognize, it’s a face of “guy try to look cool and stylish in front of his crush” and I can see how obviously he enjoys the closeness between him and my frd. Okay, we got a problem here: My frd (which have a boyfriend apparently) wants me to meet one of her male friend but he kinda fell for her and I am stuck in the middle. WTF?
Later on, when my frd asked to see the photo, her reaction is this: “It is kinda sweet!”. I am literally speechless from the bottom of my heart.
True awkwardness number 2: As he lives not far away from me (a 2-station-distance), my frd finally asked the question she has been dying to ask (I guess), “Since you guys live not much far away, maybe you can share a train journey back home with each other.” What the fuck should I say, there’s completely no space for me to decline this. So, there I was, sharing a 1 hour train journey from the Western New Territories in Hong Kong back to the Eastern with a guy I just met. We managed to chat for a while, stuffs like how you and she (my frd) met, what do you study and what do you like to do on the spare time, but most of the time we just look down on each other’s phone and let the silence do his job.
By the time we arrived to his station (I have to go change another line to get home), he politely said that he should probably accompany me to my station (another gesture of a gentleman) I responsed him almost instantly but still keeping my composure on, politely said, “aw thanks. but i dun want to cause you much trouble and waste your time.” When the platform door opens and we headed our separate ways, I am a little bit glad of this awkwardness finally over.
Life experience gained and a lesson learnt: Don’t lose your cool on the first meet with a new friend, you might actually discover something way more interesting…(pat self back)
**just realized recap item 4,5 have to delay to the next post. sorry readers (if i had any, in which btw if you are reading this, feel free to leave me a word. but no haters please x) 04:26, 18 Feb**